


Aaron Goodwin/Reader: Comfort

by psychosocial_ish



Category: Ghost Adventures (TV), Ghost Adventures RPF
Genre: Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Self-Harm, Support, Triggers, friends - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-29
Updated: 2016-10-29
Packaged: 2018-08-27 20:06:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8414929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/psychosocial_ish/pseuds/psychosocial_ish
Summary: (Y/n) has always had it pretty rough when it comes to mental illness and her coping skills. Lucky for her, she has one of the greatest best friends in the world.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for self-harm.   
> If you ever feel like self harming, please don't. You're beautiful and amazing and loved. <3  
> I really hope you guys enjoy reading!

Mental illness is something (y/n) had been dealing with all of her life. The depression, the anxiety, and the hyper-vigilance were a constant in her every-day activities. On their own they were difficult. When combined, they were unbearable and resulted in panic attacks.   
That’s what this day was leading up to.  
From the moment (y/n) woke up, her entire mood had been off. She was at a baseline of anger and anxiety. The feeling of uneasiness in her stomach made her sweat and it felt as though at any moment she would throw up. It was like a war was raging in her mind all day. She constantly heard static and chatter in her head and it made it impossible to concentrate on her school work, so she spent the day doodling in her private notebook. The one thing, however, that kept (y/n) going throughout the day, was knowing that when she got home, Aaron would be there to make everything better.   
Lunch was one of the times of the day she could get away from everyone and everything. (Y/n) bought her lunch and snuck away quickly to the bathroom, where she sat on the floor and ate as she played around on her phone. Suddenly, there was a text from Aaron.  
 _Hey hon, hope school is going okay._  
She sighed, a small smile forming on her lips. Though she was happy to receive a text from her best friend, she also was frustrated slightly that he hadn’t noticed that today was one of her bad days.   
_It’s alright, I guess. I’m at lunch._  
 _In the bathroom again?_  
(Y/n) chuckled. _Yep. It’s one of those days…_ She took a bite of her lunch and decided that her stomach was still too unsettled to finish the whole thing. She tossed it into the trash next to her just as a few of the preppy girls walked in laughing at something stupid.  
Pulling the hood up onto her head from her black hoodie, (y/n)’s phone lit up, showing another text from Aaron.   
_If you need anything at all, please call me or text me._  
Her smile grew bigger as she read it. (Y/n) knew she could always count on him.  
 _I will. Thanks G_  
She heard the bell ring, signaling the end of lunch, and stood as she tucked her phone back into her pocket. Dreading the rest of the day, (y/n) reluctantly walked to class.

 

Finally. The day was over. Waiting for the busses and student drivers to leave first, (y/n) sat under the steps by the library, reading her book. Reading was something that helped keep her calm when she had to be around others in times like these…  
Teachers began to leave for home, passing by (y/n) and saying “Have a good day!” on the way out the door, to which she replied with a simple “You, too.”  
(Y/n) checked her phone constantly to see what time it was and if the student drivers were finally all gone. She was beginning to feel that restlessness, that oh-too-familiar restlessness. She felt a churning in her stomach each time she turned a page in her book, aching for her to finally begin the trek home.  
Looking up out of the window one last time, (y/n) saw that the coast was finally clear and smiled, tucking her book inside of her backpack as she took out her headphones and iPod. She stood, placing them in her ears and blasting her “music to walk home by.”  
Though (y/n) lived only a mile away from the school, her walk seemed to take much longer today and she didn’t know why. Maybe it was the anxiety and that it was just one of her bad days. Either way, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen and she began to pick up her pace, increasing the volume of her music in hopes of drowning out the thoughts racing in her head…  
(Y/n)’s lungs burned. Her throat was dry. Her eyes prickled with tears as she struggled to draw in the breaths that left her too soon for her body to absorb the oxygen. She pulled up the hood and drew it tightly around her face so that no one would see her tears and her flushed cheeks. She was almost home. She could make it. Just one more block and she would be safe in her best friend’s arms.  
Or so she thought…  
There was a note on the door. Wiping her eyes, (y/n) read it out-loud.  
“ _(Y/n), had to go out to the store. We needed a few things. The key is under the mat in case you forgot yours. ~Aaron_ ”  
Lifting the welcome mat frantically as she felt waves of panic rushing over her, (y/n) desperately sought the key out, finally feeling the cold metal against her fingertips and grasping it so tightly that it left an imprint in her palm. She jammed it into the lock, twisting it forcefully as she hyperventilated, and pushed the door open.  
Throwing her backpack on the floor, (y/n) ripped the key from the lock and slammed the door shut, leaving it unlocked so that Aaron would be able to get inside. She ran up the stairs to her room and locked the door behind her.  
(Y/n) sat on her bed, hands covering her mouth as she screamed till her throat was sore. The panic and anxiety rippled through her body, sending shockwaves straight to her core. Her eyes shut tightly as tears spilled over onto her flushed cheeks. But the voices and thoughts racing in her head were still shouting, shouting, shouting… She covered her ears and screamed as loud as she could once more, hoping to finally silence them. But she was, once again, losing the battle.   
Breath heavy, face red and stained with traces of where tears once ran like streams, (y/n) unzipped her hoodie and threw it across the room. She looked down at her arms where the old scars of previous battles lay as reminders of her constant struggle. She knew it would kill Aaron if he found out, but she had to do it… It was the only way she could calm down when he wasn’t home to save her from herself…

 

Sitting on the edge of the bathtub wrapping the bandages tightly about her forearms, (y/n) smiled. She had finally stopped crying and the thoughts and voices ended their incessant running and screaming in her mind. She loved the sight of the blood as it flowed freely and intermingled with droplets from incision to incision. The word “STOP” had been inscribed into her arm in addition to nearly thirty other small lines. It looked so pretty… And she also wished that it didn’t. Yes, the cutting helped her. But it hurt her. Yes, it calmed her. But it hurt her and Aaron. Behind the good of it for her, there was always bad...  
She finally finished wrapping the bandages and looked in the mirror at herself. (Y/n) saw that her eyes were puffy and she didn’t want Aaron to see she had been crying again. That would mean that he would ask to check her arms, because every time she had her panic attacks, she would cry. To make herself stop crying, she would cut. And Aaron was never there when it happened. When he was there for her panic attacks, he helped her more than the cutting ever did.  
Turning on the faucet and letting the water run until it was at a warm temperature, (y/n) let her hands run under the water until they were filled and then rubbed her face gently, letting the warmth soak into her tired, tear stained skin.   
And then the front door opened.   
Her heart stopped.  
“(Y/n), I’m home!” Aaron called from downstairs, “Can you help me with the groceries?”  
Quickly shutting the faucet and running to her room, (y/n) threw on a grey sweatshirt and put her (h/c) hair up in a messy bun. “Coming!” She slowly walked from her room till she could see that Aaron was actually standing there. Her mind had tricked her a few times before.  
“Hey, hon,” he said warmly, a smile dancing across his lips, “Wanna grab a few of these? I got your favourites for dinner tonight.”  
Smiling brightly, (y/n) came down the stairs as fast as her legs would carry her and grabbed a few bags, bringing them to rest on the island in the kitchen. She eagerly began taking things out and found that he had indeed bought her favourites for dinner. He even got her the ice cream she liked!  
Once they finally had everything put away, they pulled each other into massive hugs. Aaron rubbed soothing circles on her back as he pressed a kiss to her head, which lay in the crook of his neck. “Wanna talk about what happened today?”’  
(Y/n) pulled away and looked in his eyes. She found that she was too embarrassed about what had just happened to discuss it right at this moment. “Later,” she whispered, looking down at her feet.  
Aaron nodded. “Okay, we don’t have to right now.” He handed her some boxes. “What we _can_ do right now is get started on dinner, if you like.”  
The smile returned to her face again. She always could count on him.

 

Cooking with Aaron was always something that (y/n) could look forward to at the end of days like these. She could unwind and joke around, and he always found new ways to make her laugh. Somehow, she made him laugh, too. At the moment, he was holding up two tomatoes to his eyes and making buzzing noises, and in return, (y/n) took an onion and shouted, “Ogres have layers!”  
What she hadn’t noticed was how the sleeve of her sweatshirt had fallen just enough to show the bandages. She hadn’t noticed the look in Aaron’s eyes when he saw the bandages and the redness bleeding through it slightly. But he didn’t say anything. He would take care of it before bed…

 

“So I picked out a few movies,” Aaron said, sitting next to (y/n) on the couch, “ones that you and I both like. You can pick tonight.” He smiled.   
Taking the stack of movies from his hands eagerly, she immediately chose “Killer Klowns from Outer Space” and said, “I know you’ve been wanting to watch this,” as a smile danced across her lips.  
“Yeah!” he laughed, jumping up in excitement as he took the case from her hands. He bent in front of the TV and popped the disc in the DVD player before the timer went off in the kitchen.  
“Just in time! I’m gonna go make us our plates.” He jumped up and ran to the kitchen. “Don’t start it without me again!”  
(Y/n) laughed, but as she looked down at her arms, covered by bandages and sleeves, her smile and cheerful mood began to recede. She wanted to turn back time and change her decision. She wanted to run and hide, but Aaron, good old Aaron, was always able to find her. And if not, she always eventually would go back to him. She couldn’t imagine life without him.  
Just as her thoughts were getting to her, Aaron strolled in with two steaming plates of food. He put on his best fake French accent and said, “One for you, Madame,” as he set the plate on the table in front of (y/n), “And one for moi,” as he sat down next to her. “Alright, let’s watch this bad boy.”  
She grabbed the remote and clicked the play button as she took a bite and felt herself now residing in her happy place, right where she belonged, with Aaron, good food, and a good movie.

 

They both had finished before the movie was even half-way through. She brought their dishes to the kitchen after pausing it, and began to rinse them before putting them in the dishwasher. What she didn’t know was that Aaron had followed her and was observing her.  
(Y/n) rolled up her sleeves as to not get them wet or dirty, her bandages now completely visible. Aaron’s throat burned with the sadness that threatened to overtake him. He watched her as she rinsed off the plates and carefully put them on the rack inside the washer. She hated the noise of the plates clinking.  
Once she had finished, (y/n) turned and jumped, not expecting to find Aaron standing there watching her. She laughed as she placed a hand over her heart. “Dude… What are you doing? You scared the hell outta me!” She laughed harder, but once she saw that Aaron had tears streaming down his stone-like face, she soon felt ashamed. Then she noticed her sleeves were still rolled up and she began to frantically roll them back down, but Aaron interjected as he walked towards her, grasping her hands gently as he whispered, “Stop.”  
(Y/n) looked up into the large brown eyes, tears spilling from her own (e/c) eyes. “I’m sorry,” she choked out.   
Aaron pulled her into a tight hug, tucking her head securely under his chin. He smoothed her hair and rubbed soothing circles into her back. “Tell me what happened, babygirl.” he said gently, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.  
She explained, and as she did so, Aaron felt more and more pain stabbing at his heart. How could she have hid all this from him? Why did she feel she had to hide everything and bottle it up, then smash it down with a blade to her skin? He wanted to be there for her, she knew that. But he couldn’t be there if she didn’t let him… And she knew that as well.  
“I’m sorry, Aaron…” she sobbed into his chest.  
“It’s okay, sweetheart, shh,” he cooed, “It’s okay…”  
They stood embracing for a little while longer before (y/n) finally pulled away and asked, “Can we finish watching the movie?”  
Aaron smiled softly as he wiped her tears away with his thumbs. “Of course, baby.”

 

Once the movie had finished, Aaron and (y/n) were still complaining about aching stomachs from laughing too much. They walked up the stairs together to the bathroom, where Aaron had her sit down on the edge of the bathtub and said, “Okay, let me see.”  
She knew the routine, but it didn’t make it any easier. She rolled up her sleeves again, allowing him to look over the bandages carefully. Once he saw that the blood was leaking through, he nodded his head. “We need to change them.”  
(Y/n) hated this part…  
Aaron carefully began unwrapping her arms as she winced in pain. This was going into her stacks of mental notes: Don’t cut, because it hurts like hell to change the bandages.   
Picking up a paper towel and dousing it with hydrogen peroxide, Aaron held her arm steady as he wiped away the dried blood. She hissed in pain and jerked her arm back, but Aaron held a firm grip and looked at her gently. “This is why you need to try to stop, baby. I’m telling you.”  
“I know…” she said, wincing again as Aaron dabbed at the wounds and wrapped fresh bandages on her arm. He took the other arm and repeated the process again, wiping away the dried blood and dabbing the wounds before wrapping up her arm with a fresh bandage.  
(Y/n) sighed. It was finally over. She tried to stand, but Aaron gave her another look and she stayed where she was.   
Aaron got down on his knees and took her arms again, kissing them before looking up at her and saying, “Please, (y/n). Let me help you before you hurt yourself.”  
She felt tears stinging her eyes again. She nodded before she whispered, “Okay.”

 

(Y/n) had changed into some fresh pajamas and sat on the edge of the king-size bed, waiting for Aaron to get out of the bathroom. He usually took his time to trim his beard and get himself clean and comfortable enough to fall asleep.   
He finally came out, dressed in some shorts and his black Big Steppin’ t-shirt. He smiled at her and said, “Alright, ready?”  
(Y/n) nodded and smiled, knowing exactly what he meant.   
Every time something like this happened, he always took his time to help her get to sleep so that she could rest properly. He would turn down the thermostat to almost 60 degrees, since that was the typical temperature at which humans fell asleep the easiest. He would then break out the king-size electric blanket and enormous pillows, ensuring that (y/n) would be the most comfortable.  
Aaron walked to the closet and reached towards the second highest shelf for the blanket. “Get up on under them covers, little lady,” he said with a heavy southern drawl.  
Chuckling to herself, she got under the covers and made herself comfortable before Aaron spread the blanket over the bed with a high pitched “Whoo!” before he plugged the cord into the wall and turned the blanket onto the second highest setting.   
He got under the covers next to (y/n) after plugging in the nightlight they always used in times like this. Both lay on their stomachs, heads turned towards one another.  
“You comfy enough?” he asked.  
(Y/n) nodded.  
“Warm enough?”  
Again, she nodded.  
“You suuuuuuure?”  
She chuckled.   
He chuckled back. “Good.” He moved closer to her and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “I love you, (y/n).”  
Smiling, she closed her eyes, the warmth of the blanket pulling her into sleep. “I love you, too, Aaron.”

**Author's Note:**

> So I wrote this after having a dream that I wasn't doing okay and Aaron was taking care of me, making sure that I was warm enough when I got into bed, putting on my nightlight for me, making sure that if I woke up from a nightmare, he'd be there to help me... Aaron is just such a sweetie in real life, I can imagine him doing stuff like this for anyone he's close to...
> 
> Hope you liked it! c:


End file.
